Let’s face it….. sometimes you get tired – especially if you’re no longer thirty-something, or forty-something or over fifty. As a sixty-two year old woman I have learned, the hard way, that the key to aging gracefully is surrender. Surrender is not about giving up. Surrender is actually about giving into the power and glory that you are!
Now, let’s turn up the pressure: At some point, say when you’ve turned fifty, or lost a parent, you’re forced to confront the fact of your mortality – the one thing about your life that is 100% certain. This can be a huge turning point for you. Do you choose to hold on even more tightly to what you know, or open to something vaster that you can imagine?
I’ve been an entrepreneur for over thirty years, and for most of those years I didn’t know how to surrender. Honestly, I had a very strong aversion to surrender! (If you want to learn about Aversion Practice, check out my blog, Never say Never). I was willful, determined, stubborn, and sure if I just kept pushing and doing what the marketing and self-help gurus told me to do, I would be wildly successful. I can’t tell you how many times I designed and promoted fantastic workshops, only to have a sprinkling of people attend, or how often I simply felt invisible.
Then in 2007 I crashed. I literally found myself on my hands and knees – depressed, panicked, and totally depleted. My hormones were going haywire, my adrenals were shot, my libido was dead, and I felt terribly alone. I was terrified that this was it – I was going to lose everything I had worked so hard to build. Fortunately I found a fantastic naturopathic doctor who tended to my body, and a spiritual coach who introduced me to a body of work that taught me how to replenish my soul. When I started the Wellness Sexuality Practice a few years later, I REALLY began to come back to life!
And yet, what did I do with this infusion of turn on and vitality? I used it to do what I’d been doing for years – push and drive myself. After all, wasn’t that how you’re supposed to get ahead and succeed in business? So even though I had more energy, I was still hitting a ceiling financially. And, slowly but surely, exhaustion started to creep in – again.
Then I discovered Human Design. FINALLY, the light went on and everything clicked into place. I learned I am one of five Types, the Projector. For this type, the key to joyfully succeed at life is to “Wait to be invited.” In other words, surrender and allow the universe to call you out. OMG, I was beyond shocked and completely in disbelief. What do you mean “Wait to be invited?” This turned on its head everything I’d been taught and practiced for over 30 years!
Even more stunning was the revelation that Projectors are NOT meant to work and push and do, do, do. Did this mean I was supposed to sit still and do nothing? I would rather die. But the thing is, I was already dying; it was clear that if i continued to do what I had been doing I would lose all my joy and vitality.
Then I found out that Projectors have a very important role. They are here to guide and teach the other types, who are designed to be the creators and doers out in front! Projectors get to write and teach and build things. They can be great leaders and mentors. They are here to ignite others!
Now that I am following my strategy, my life looks and feels amazing. I feel more energized and turned on than ever, and I have the key to sustaining this new found vitality. My guiding principle is – do what brings me joy. That can look like writing this blog, guiding clients to learn the Wellness Sexuality Practice, teaching a workshop, or…… taking a nap! As my vitality grows, and I rest in the certainty of knowing my place on the planet, I am experiencing the grace of being invited. I guess you can say that I have finally surrendered and the rewards are beyond anything I could have imagined.
Stay tuned for more stories about the transformative power of Human Design.
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